Wednesday, 15 May 2013

One lesson at a time

I'd say throughout the course of my fairly short life, I've learnt quite a few lessons. It's difficult picking the one that has shaped me the most, or the one that I try to live my life by. I also think there are a lot of lessons that we learn but are more than happy to forget about. When I was growing up, and I'd say pretty much up to the age of 18, I felt I had my whole life ahead of me.


I wanted to travel, I was moving to London and I wanted to find out who I really was. I'd just started a relationship, but I wouldn't let that dictate who I would become, and I would just take it easy. I got a tattoo, I dyed my hair blonde and I just enjoyed life as much as I could. 

Moving to London was hard. So truly difficult. The person I was sharing with was awful, I've no idea why they wanted a room mate to begin with when they were so obviously uneasy with my presence. They didn't even tell me where the boiler was, so I couldn't turn on the heating or hot water. They were vegetarian, which I respected, but they would take all my 'meaty' items out of the shared freezer and allow them to just thaw out. I wasn't allowed anyone to visit, but of course they were. To be honest, it really broke me. I wanted to move back up North and I didn't want to leave. I quit university and I moved back. I fell pregnant. 

This is when the real change of my life happened - this is the greatest lesson I'll ever learn. Life is unpredictable. I still want to travel, and I still feel like I need to discover who I am. But as well as this, I want to be the greatest mother and the kindest wife. I want to provide for my family and I want to feel so much love every day that I think I might explode. I honestly never thought I would become a parent, it just didn't interest me, but I am so glad I did. It wasn't planned, but I've never been happier than when Dylan looks up at me or giggles. He is the sweetest thing.

I'm back at university, although it's a different institution and a different course. I really love it. I'm so glad I changed my mind and, in turn, my career. I had wanted to study psychology, but being a parent changes your mindset a little bit. I get far too emotional, and although I would have loved being able to help people, I think I would have crumbled. Now, I hope to work in publishing and really succeed in that field. 

My dad always told me that life is like a train journey, you might know where you're headed but there are still so many different possibilities. People may get on and people leave the train at different stops. The train could be delayed, but you will still get to your destination - it's just a matter of waiting.


3 comments

  1. This is such a lovely post, very inspiring. x

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  2. Thank you, it was quite nice to write it down x

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  3. very very inspiring post.
    Congratulations on Dylan xx

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